Cathy's blog

You probably know that I'm an introvert.

And yet, I was always the extrovert in the family.

Only because I’m just a teeny tiny bit less introverted than the rest of us, my parents decided I was the *social* one, the *talkative* one.

I honestly believed I was adopted for a while 🥴.

It took me a long time, and a whole string of personality questionnaires, self-reflection, and finally reading the book Quiet by Susan Cain, to discover:

I’m not an extrovert - I’m just strong-willed. 

I can be sociable - when I feel like it.

I enjoy parties  - when I can dance & avoid small talk 🤗.

I like being out and about, observing people - but I don't need it all the time.

I'm outspoken, I have opinions, and yes - I can be stubborn.

Everything is relative.

What's courageous for one person, is just another Tuesday for someone else.

What's spicy for someone, is bland for another.

What's introvert for one, is extrovert for another.

I used to be quick to judge. And label.

I still am sometimes.

It's so easy to box someone in a small definition of something.

It can give a momentary feeling of control.

But it's not helpful.

People are complex. One label never captures the whole.

And I hate being labeled and judged myself!

So I've also learned that there's a better way - that looks a bit like this:

Get to know yourself. The better you can capture your own complexity and weirdness, the easier it becomes to:

• Get to know others in all their complexity.

• Look beyond first impressions.

• Get genuinely curious.

• Ask: what don't I know yet about this person?

To my shame, I have to admit that I was surprised to find just how wrong we can be about people, if our focus is too narrow.

Try it!

What about a label & judgment-free week?

Who's in?